Real Advice for New Moms by a New Mom
My first few months as a mother have been quite the learning experience. Motherhood is an exhausting, beautiful journey I wouldn’t trade for the world. If you are a new mama or a mom to be, I wrote this post for you. Please enjoy Real Advice for New Moms by a New Mom.
Before I begin I want to reiterate that I am in fact a new mom, so I am still learning. Please be kind if you choose to respond. Now more than ever we all need to love and support one another.
1. Lower Your Expectations
You will not be able to complete everything you wanted to in a day. It’s okay if the laundry has to wait or you don’t make dinner every night. Babies are unpredictable. As much as I would love for my daughter to be on a consistent schedule, it has yet to happen. I’ve had to lower my expectations, because sometimes she just needs snuggles and attention. And that’s okay.
It’s also important to lower your expectations toward your baby. Don’t compare your experience with that of other moms. Every baby is different. They need different types of attention and develop at different rates. Again, that’s okay. Just do your best for your little one and that’s all that matters.
2. Communicate What You Need
Some days by the time my husband gets off work I am very ready for a break. When you are feeling drained emotionally, physically and mentally, be sure to communicate that to your significant other or family. Asking for help does not make you weak and it does not mean you love your baby any less.
3. Mother Instinct is a Real Thing
When my daughter was about a month old, she slept really well all afternoon. It was strange for her, but a welcomed break. Then she was a terror all night. Cluster feeding and upset. Not acting at all like herself. By 6:00am I looked at my husband and said, “She’s sick. Something is wrong with her.” He told me what the doctor had, that she was likely going through a growth spurt and just needed extra attention. We ended up taking her to the ER later that day, because she had a low grade temperature and I could not shake the feeling something was wrong.
Turns out she had a UTI that had developed into a kidney infection, something I did not know was common for baby girls. We spent seven days at the hospital with her getting all manner of tests and IV antibiotics. My point is, motherly instinct is a thing. The doctors kept telling me how good it was that I had listened to my gut. So listen to yours. You know your baby.
4.You Are Not the Only Mom
It’s 2:00am and your baby won’t sleep and you feel like you might be going a little insane. “Other mothers are able to handle this,” you think. “Maybe I am just weak. Maybe I’m not made for this.”
Wrong.
You are not the only mom. Trust me. You are perpetually sleep deprived and learning a whole new way of life, so it makes sense for you to feel this way. Remember to ask for help when you need it. Step into the next room to collect your thoughts if you have to. And know that you are not alone. I find comfort in knowing there are mothers around the globe just as frustrated as I am.
5. It’s a Whole New Type of Love
You’ve likely heard people say “there’s nothing like a mother’s love.” Well, there isn’t. Suddenly there is this tiny human depending on you, crying for you and looking for you if you leave the room. I never thought I would be so understanding about such intense sleep deprivation, diaper blow-outs and long nights rocking in a chair. They say you won’t be prepared for the love you feel for your child, and truly there is no way to be prepared. Just revel in it. Soak in those baby snuggles and enjoy every little moment. It’s a whole new type of love.
6. You Will be Thirsty
No one told me that if you are breastfeeding you will feel more thirsty than you ever have in your life. Keep lots of water nearby at all times. Seriously, that thirst is intense, so be sure to stay hydrated.
7. Take it Easy
My next piece of advice for new moms goes along with lowering your expectations, but it’s so important in those early days to take it easy. Like my nurse said as I was leaving the hospital: There is a dinner plate size hole in your abdomen that is trying to heal. Don’t over-do it. Listen to your body and don’t do anything that hurts.
8. Put Down Your Phone
I’m sure my family and friends would like to hear from me more often. Maybe I should be taking more pictures. But my husband and I noticed our daughter noticing our cell phones. Even at two or three weeks old she would fuss if turned our attention to Instagram or Facebook. She smiled less when we pushed that camera in front of her face. So just put down the phone and give your baby your full attention. Talk to them and watch them study your face. You don’t have to answer that text message right away or reach for the phone as soon as it rings. These days will fly by, so be present.
9. Prioritize Prayer
Like I mentioned previously, motherhood is exhausting. You will be stretched in ways you never knew you could be (literally and metaphorically speaking). Now more than ever it is important you prioritize your prayer life. Spend time alone with the Lord every day, because the truth is you are not enough. But with God all things are possible. Pray that he would give you wisdom, patience, strength and whatever else you might need for the day. Then thank Him for sustaining you so far. Out of all my Real Advice for New Moms by a New Mom, prioritizing prayer is the most important.
10. Follow Other Inspiring Moms
My last piece of Real Advice for New Moms by a New Mom is to follow other inspiring moms. Now, this suggestion comes with a disclaimer. Do not follow people if you are struggling and they make you feel worse. Find moms online or even in your local area whom you look up to and will help guide you in your new life as a parent.
Thank you for reading Real Advice for New Moms by a New Mom. For more about hygge baby content check out these posts below:
20 Things I Learned in the First 20 Weeks of Pregnancy
5 Helpful Books to Read During Pregnancy
Official Reveal: How to Create a Hygge Nursery
Pros and Cons of Pregnancy During a Pandemic
9 Nursery Organization Hacks for New Moms
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Love always,